Have you ever been in a relationship where you were long gone before you even left?
Your heart, your mind, your soul.
All gone before you physically made your way out the door.
The person you used to love now drives you crazy.
It’s hard to remember why you even got together.
You just feel sad and lonely.
Your house doesn’t feel like home anymore.
You wonder why you are still there.
What keeps you from leaving?
We tell ourselves we don’t want to hurt them.
We don’t want to disrupt the kids.
We haven’t tried hard enough.
I think most of that is a lie.
We are afraid.
Afraid of what people will say.
Afraid of what will happen to us.
Afraid of being alone.
This was all true for me.
ALL except for what people would say.
I didn’t care what other’s thought, I hated myself enough for everyone else.
I felt more alone in my marriage than I did when I was truly alone after divorce.
I lied to myself for so many years.
I hid behind hope.
Hope that it had to get better.
Hope that my kids weren’t seeing the disfunction.
But it didn’t get better.
And my kids saw all sorts of disfunction.
My daughter still talks about it two years later.
That hurts my heart.
I didn’t have the skills to make that relationship survive let alone thrive.
I tried. REALLY HARD.
Successful relationships don’t just happen.
They are built by emotionally successful people.
I’m one of those successful people now.
The end of a relationship doesn’t mean failure.
For me, it was closure on a life I was not really living.
Closure on my emptiness and insecurities.
An ending can be the beginning of who you are meant to be.
The ending of my marriage was painful.
But my beginning has been AMAZING.
Your relationship ends.
You get to decide what to make it mean.
I can help you with closure.
I can help you with feelings of failure.
I can help you start again.
Because I’ve been there and I didn’t just survive.
I thrived.
